please critique this design

[CajunDave]

i had a customer come in and asked for a front view of a train . wants it in color and told me to do my thing with it. im having trouble coming up with something im happy with. ive done 3 different ones so far on paper with over 10 hours invested already and my head is starting to spin. i need a critique on the layout and colors. this is a rough pen and marker drawing so i wasnt trying to make it perfectly clean so dont critique that aspect please.

im pretty sure im either gonna bring the bottom flames in closer as i feel they are kinda overpowering that size or im gonna completely take them out and do something else right there instead. please give me your opinions on this i want knock this design out the park.

train.jpg

[OwlsDen]

I like the design how it is. I don't get the significance of all the imagery. I would simplify the design. The train and smoke are great. Do you really need the wings an blue flames? Why can't it just be an awesome train? I don't want you to think I am coming down on your design, I think it is awesome. I just think that sometimes we over think stuff and feel the need to pile in a bunch of things that don't matter. The design is great but maybe it just needs to be a train without all the other stuff. It's strong enough to stand on its own.

[CajunDave]

just from a few things he mentioned on why he wanted the train. he dad died and loved trains ( hince the wings and the train ) i love eyes (hince the eyes) and i put the glowing teal/turq. color under the front guard and was like oh this looks cool i should throw in some flamage . dude also mentioned he likes ghostly/sinister imagery. but he also said to just do my own thing . i do feel like the flames and wings are taking away from the train. i would love to keep the wings ....maybe take the flames out and just leave the teal glow and dont have it extend out very far? i dunno. dude mows grass for a living too he is pretty tan.

[OwlsDen]

Whatever you do, it will be a killer piece. Maybe fade the wings to black at the tips so you don't need as much detail. There is a lot more detail in the wings than the train, and I think it confuses the design. Maybe tighten up the flames and pull them in closer like you said, might even say maybe the flames could be red and the wings teal. Man, maybe I am over thinking it now. I am sure you will make a cool tattoo.

[CajunDave]

i know right !! ive gone beyond over thinking this tattoo ive worked on it solid for 2 days and i have 24 hours to finalize the design . my heads gonna explode.i think i just need to walk away from it for a while.

[serial1313]

I like the blue in the flames, but I think this design is stronger w/out them. I would take them out & roll w/ it. The only problems I had w/ this design is the wings being seen though the fire & the flames in front of the train. If you get rid of the fire it solves those problems & it doesn't take away from the main subject.

[The Limey]

Wings morphing out of the smoke might balance it out/make it easier to read

[Tazman]

I too think the flames should go. Also when I first look at the image my eyes are drawn to the eyes in the wings. I think if u toned down the wings a little and removed the eyes in the wings and remove the flames, this would be a very solid piece.

[nivek]

Maybe simplify the wings into a dark blue or black from the tips in, without the linework or less. I like the smoke but yes it unnecessary. If the wings morphed into the smoke maybe.

Looks good though

[Scentless Apprentice]

Where abouts is this to be placed on the body?